Almost 7 months and here I am again. Just wanted to share what I feel right now.
We'll, its Wednesday and while Im on my way to office (inside the MRT North Station specifically), I have received a text from a person who usually and commonly appears on my phone. I thought it was just a 'common' text BUT I was wrong. I dont know how to feel upon reading the text. In fact, at first, I was in doubt. I even replied 'weh?'. I thought it was only a joke (hoping...). A few seconds, I came to my senses and replied again, 'ganun ka rush?'. Thoughts in my mind came rushing through; 'is it real?', 'why so rush?', 'how long?', 'she ok?', 'am i ok?', 'is this what God wants?', 'can she be ok?', 'what is she feeling now?' and many more. But I have to composed myself. I have known this possibilty or this thing to happen. But its just I was not expecting it to happen so fast. Maybe next year would be fine.
Dont know what to think of. In fact, I dont want to think about it. I want to pretend that its not happening. Different emotions/feelings is clogging my heart and mind right now. But one thing Im sure of. God cannot be mistaken. If its His will, I know that something good will come out of it. I was just so lucky that I know a God who is powerful, loving and all-knowing. In Him, I put my trust. We may be hurting now... But in the end... I know... joy will fill our hearts...
God, give us the strength we need. Help us to accept things and increase our faith in You. and in Your ways. We cannot understand or comprehend the way You think, BUT one thing we can be assure of, it is the fact that 'YOU KNOW... we dont'. Mold us. Use us.
All these I pray, In Jesus name, Amen.
Wednesday, August 29, 2012
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
I need YOU in this place...
After 3 years sa wakas ma-update din tong blog ko. And the credit goes to Ms. Vanessa Villaruel-Bocacao, the 'Queen blog-reader'. Thank you, thank you... :D
After my Kforce-Amkor employment, here I am now in NGA.
Well, what I am feeling right now? I am so bored. And I am starting to ask this question 'Is this where God really wants me to be?' Do I get Him right, that this is where I should be? Salarywise, its ok. Travel time, ok. But why I am feeling like this? I am being paid without doing any work. Wow. Is it really good? Maybe for a few days, its just ok, but for a month now? I am really starting to ask questions... Hahaha
In my stay here, there were times I really asked God of the reason or reasons why.
God, what is my purpose here in my new company? I have just learned that one of our bosses say that I was too quiet. I was kinda worried because I know that the company where I work for really looks for a 'party-people' employees. I wasn't like that God. And I believe I dont have to change to fit in. But God, why am I here? What is YOUR plan for me here? I believe, and I wanted to believe that you put me here for a reason. To bring 'some' people here back to you, I guess? But you know God, today I was in doubt. In doubt of how am I going to do that if the environment here is not who I am.. I was so down :(
God, I pray and ask that YOUR will be done. Use me in this place. Use me God to let people know of what kind of God I have. A powerful and merciful God. God strengthen me physically, emotionally and most esp. spiritually. God I need YOU in this place. I wasnt that ok when Im here most of the times. There's sadness in my heart. I am not complaining God, but God please help me deal with this. Show me what YOU want me to do. i cant continue if im like this. Need YOUR help Father and Im choosing to put my trust in YOU. In Jesus name, Amen.
After my Kforce-Amkor employment, here I am now in NGA.
Well, what I am feeling right now? I am so bored. And I am starting to ask this question 'Is this where God really wants me to be?' Do I get Him right, that this is where I should be? Salarywise, its ok. Travel time, ok. But why I am feeling like this? I am being paid without doing any work. Wow. Is it really good? Maybe for a few days, its just ok, but for a month now? I am really starting to ask questions... Hahaha
In my stay here, there were times I really asked God of the reason or reasons why.
God, what is my purpose here in my new company? I have just learned that one of our bosses say that I was too quiet. I was kinda worried because I know that the company where I work for really looks for a 'party-people' employees. I wasn't like that God. And I believe I dont have to change to fit in. But God, why am I here? What is YOUR plan for me here? I believe, and I wanted to believe that you put me here for a reason. To bring 'some' people here back to you, I guess? But you know God, today I was in doubt. In doubt of how am I going to do that if the environment here is not who I am.. I was so down :(
God, I pray and ask that YOUR will be done. Use me in this place. Use me God to let people know of what kind of God I have. A powerful and merciful God. God strengthen me physically, emotionally and most esp. spiritually. God I need YOU in this place. I wasnt that ok when Im here most of the times. There's sadness in my heart. I am not complaining God, but God please help me deal with this. Show me what YOU want me to do. i cant continue if im like this. Need YOUR help Father and Im choosing to put my trust in YOU. In Jesus name, Amen.
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